Verse 1 – David had several wives by this time. Both Absalom and Tamar had Maacah as their mother. Amon’s mother was Ahinoam. Therefore, Tamar was Amon’s half sister. It doesn’t matter, it was still wrong for Amon to lust after her.
Verse 2 – Amon was frustrated because he knew he couldn’t take Tamar as his wife.
Verse 5 – Jonadab devised a plan in which Amon could be with Tamar. Manipulation is clear in this situation.
Verse 11 – Sleep with me is literally “lie with me.”
Verse 12 – Three times Tamar urged her brother not to violate her. This was a serious sin (Deuteronomy 22:25-29). This crime would bring shame to both.
Verse 15 – When scripture say’s that Amon hated her afterwards was proof that his feelings for her had been only lust. Here’s the difference; love is patient; love is kind; and love does not demand its own way. Lust requires immediate satisfaction; is harsh; lust demands its own way. Lust results in self-disgust and hatred of the other person.
Verse 16 – Rape was strictly forbidden (Deuteronomy 22:28, 29). By sending Tamar away as Amon did, made it look like to the servants, that Tamar had been the aggressor. Amon’s actions destroyed her chances of marriage because she was no longer a virgin.
Verse 20 – Absalom tried to comfort Tamar and persuade her not to turn this into a public scandal. A desolate woman would be one who would never marry and had no means of support.
Verse 21 – David was furious, but apparently did nothing. He knew he couldn’t force the tow to marry because it was against Moses law.
Verse 22 – Absalom didn’t say anything to Amon because he was plotting revenge.
Verses 23-39 – Two years was a long time to wait on revenge but Absalom knew the opportunity would come and it did. Amon was next in line to be king (1 Chronicles 3:1). After Absalom had Amon killed, he fled to Geshur. David wanted Absalom to come back but he never sent word for him to do so.